Oldies but goodies! Here ya go,
noyehTop 10 Ways things would be different if Santa were Indian 10. At bedtime, kids would leave Cornsoup and frybread for the big guy
9. He would be wearing a red turtleneck to hide his hickeys
8. Santa's new moccasins are made out of Dasher
7. Santa has to take out a billion dollar pre-Xmas tide over loan at a border town bank
6. Five pound block of cheese under every tree
5. His elves would never show up for work on Friday's and sometimes
Monday's
4. The sleigh would need a boost every other state
3. His outfit would consist of a red flannel ribbon shirt, with matching leggings, moccasins and beaded black belt with matching beaded rimmed hat, all to match his oversized beaded gift bag. And underneath would be abeaded thong with a small delicate plume attached to the back.
2. Indian preference would require you to hire all Hopi's to fit in those teeny tiny elf outfits .
1. According to Indian time, our gifts would arrive in February.
12 Days of Christmas, rez styleOn the first day of Christmas my best snag gave to me
the Keys to a New Rez Rocket.
On the second day of Christmas my best snag gave to me
Two Beaded Nikes, and the Keys to a New Rez Rocket.
On the third day of Christmas my best snag gave to me
Three French Kisses, Two Beaded Nikes, and the Keys to a New Rez Rocket.
On the fourth day of Christmas my best snag gave to me
Four Calling Cards, Three French Kisses, Two Beaded Nikes,
and the Keys to a New Rez Rocket.
On the fifth day of Christmas my best snag gave to me
FIVE FRY BREADS, Four Calling Cards, Three French Kisses,
Two Beaded Nikes, and the Keys to a New Rez Rocket.
On the sixth day of Christmas my best snag gave to me
Six New Hickeys, FIVE FRY BREADS, Four Calling Cards,
Three French Kisses, Two Beaded Nikes, and the Keys to a New Rez Rocket.
On the seventh day of Christmas my best snag gave to me
Seven Buckskin Hides, Six New Hickeys, FIVE FRY BREADS,
Four Calling Cards, Three French Kisses, Two Beaded Nikes,
and the Keys to a New Rez Rocket.
On the eighth day of Christmas my best snag gave to me
Eight Indian Round Steaks, Seven Buckskin Hides, Six New Hickeys,
FIVE FRY BREADS, Four Calling Cards, Three French Kisses, Two Beaded Nikes,
and the Keys to a New Rez Rocket.
On the ninth day of Christmas my best snag gave to me
Nine Food Stamps, Eight Indian Round Steaks, Seven Buckskin Hides,
Six New Hickeys, FIVE FRY BREADS, Four Calling Cards, Three French Kisses,
Two Beaded Nikes, and the Keys to a New Rez Rocket.
On the tenth day of Christmas my best snag gave to me
Ten False Teeth, Nine Food Stamps, Eight Indian Round Steaks,
Seven Buckskin Hides, Six New Hickeys,FIVE FRY BREADS,
Four Calling Cards, Three French Kisses, Two Beaded Nikes,
and the Keys to a New Rez Rocket.
On the eleventh day of Christmas my best snag gave to me
Eleven Bingo Sheets, Ten False Teeth, Nine Food Stamps,
Eight Indian Round Steaks, Seven Buckskin Hides, Six New Hickeys,
FIVE FRY BREADS, Four Calling Cards, Three French Kisses, Two Beaded Nikes,
and the Keys to a New Rez Rocket.
On the twelfth day of Christmas my best snag gave to me
Twelve 49 Songs, Eleven Bingo Sheets, Ten False Teeth,
Nine Food Stamps, Eight Indian Round Steaks, Seven Buckskin Hides,
Six New Hickeys,FIVE FRY BREADS, Four Calling Cards, Three French Kisses,
Two Beaded Nikes and the Keys to a New Rez Rocket.
...then I had a really big garage sale!!!!!
AYE!!!